Why Women Stay

Many women don't necessarily want to leave the relationship; they just want the violence to stop. There are a variety of reasons why someone remains in an abusive relationship but one of the central reasons is fear: of leaving, of angering her partner, of making the situation worse. Sometimes women will make several attempts to leave before they can actually leave permanently and safely.

Some other reasons are:

• She may feel ashamed about what has happened

• Due to the level of coercion, she may believe that it is her fault

• She may still care for her partner and hope that they will change

• She may feel too confused, exhausted or unsure to make any decisions

• She may have low self-esteem as a result of the abuse

• She may be isolated from family or friends or be prevented from leaving the home or reaching out for help

• She may believe that it is better to stay for the sake of the children (e.g. wanting a father for her children and/or wishing to prevent the stigma associated with being a single parent)

• She may be scared of change and of the future (fear of poverty, of homelessness, of the backlash)

• Women may seek support from family or friends and the support they receive is likely to have a significant influence on their decision-making